What if I say something wrong? This seems to border a lot of people including me during this period. We are scared to speak up against the oppressed be it related to the #BlackLivesMatter or the #EndRape for fear of saying the wrong thing or waiting for approval from who knows where. What I have come to realize, however, is that once you have taken a sit to understand the issue at hand and listened closely, speaking up even if it puts you at risk of saying the wrong thing, say it from a place of love and be willing to take correction and do better next time rather than staying quite completely. Your silence says a lot as it can be interpreted to mean agreeing with the oppressors.
Another question we ask is what if I fail? A legit question and fear but oftentimes coming from a place of fear for what other people will think about you. These and many other of your questions are valid however, don’t let the fear of what other people will think of you stop you. Whose approval do you desperately seek to become your best self, to pursue your dreams, to start that business, to walk out of a toxic relationship, to (add yours and ask yourself)? Too often we tell ourselves that we are waiting for the stars to align before we take that bold step of faith when deep down we are waiting for permission and the approval of other people.
It is ok in some instances to seek permission and approval but be mindful and thoughtful as to what the permission/approval you seek will achieve. I seek approval and permission from God and if God ok’s it, I am good to go. When my action will affect or drastically change the life of my significant other, I seek their permission.
“One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure it’s worth watching.”~Unknown
You are smart, you are gifted, you have a purpose. Stop playing by the rule book of the world’s expectations because you will always fall short and you will get stuck. Some are stuck right now in jobs that are draining them but with high pay, some are studying a course they know they will not use in the future and some wish they can go back and study what they love doing. You may be wishing you started earlier. You can start now.
To unstuck yourself from the permission web that has entangled you for years, here is my suggestion. Acknowledge that change is scary, acknowledge your fears. Ask yourself what the worst-case scenarios will be and draft your reaction plans before they happen. Give yourself the permission you need. Find your tribe of people that will support you no matter what and keep taking a calculated risk. When you fall, stand up and try again. There will be some internal resistance as you try to permit yourself. Resistance like the thought of this is too hard, I am too old, is this the right time etc. Reflect on the resistance but don’t let them stop you. Regardless of the story, you sell yourself, it always has been up to you, and it always will be. What would happen if you woke up tomorrow and decided you didn’t need anyone to permit you? What’s the first thing you would start? No human outside of you fully understands what’s going on in your heart. Waiting for people’s approval before you go for what you believe will help you become your best self and contribute to making the world a better place may never come. Permit yourself to BE.